Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Mammoth Week for RUTS Powers

Week 3 is here, and what a week it will be! The 4 RUTS superpowers, representing every RUTS championship and Heisman Trophy/NFL MVP for the past two years, are all ranked in the Top 4 of this week's Coaches Poll...and all four lock horns this week.

It's #1 Alabama at #3 Ohio State and #2 LSU at #4 Oklahoma!

We will preview both games, and offer our predictions for who will emerge victorious...

#1 ALABAMA @ #3 OHIO STATE
Coach StuBucksman loads up the #1 Crimson Tide wagons, Shoney's breakfast in stomach, and leads his team into Columbus, Ohio for a rematch against the Buckeyes. These two teams battled it out in season 1's National Title Game, where Alabama emerged victorious 27-24. In that game, the Tide used a 27-7 run in the 2nd and 3rd quarters, including dominating the time of possession,  to separate themselves from Ohio State, and although the Bucks staged a 4th quarter rally, it was too little, too late.

Coach Stu hits up the breakfast bar before traveling with his team to Columbus

Coach UTVOL54 knows that if his team is to have a chance, they cannot have such a lapse tonight.

"We are obviously focused on the things we do well as a team," he said. "This Alabama team, on paper, is the best I've ever coached against, and we just cannot afford to have a 2-quarter brain fart like we did in last year's title game. If we do, we will lose again."

Alabama, who moved back into the nation's top-spot this week after announcing their endorsement deal with Keds, enters the game with virtually no weaknesses. Their running game and passing game can both lead them to victory, and their defense provides speed and power at all positions, even after giving up 400+ passing yards in week 1 to Miami.

"We have to eliminate mental mistakes in this game," said Coach Stu. "We're going into a hostile enviroment, and this is our first road game of the season. I am anxious to see how our young QB responds, and see how our Keds look with our all-white uniforms...I predict GLORIOUS!"

Keds...good enough for Bear, good enough for Coach Stu!

The Keds endorsement caused Alabama Facility crews to work overtime this week to alter the Bear's statue outside Bryant-Denney Stadium

A.J. McCarron, the Tide's new starter at QB, is a solid 'game manager,' but can he make the plays necessary to win a game on his own? It's likely that the Buckeyes will test his poise and moxy in the pocket tonight and force him to throw the football.

"After learning behind one of the cleanest-cut, goody-two-shoes, frat-boy quarterbacks in the history of the SEC for the past two seasons, I have no doubt in my abilities to lead this team," said McCarron earlier this week as he left the Alabama football complex in his 2010 Range Rover.

Ohio State will have to muster up some kind of offense to keep Alabama on its toes, and sophomore QB Kenny Guiton, RB Boom Herron, and WR duo DeVier Posey and Ayers Jordan can ill afford to have 'off-nights' if the Bucks expect to win this game.

We are predicting a great battle between two of the finest coaches to coach the game of football. These teams will play well, and provide fans and viewers with an entertaining display of football prowess. In the end, the Crimson Tide will be too deep for the Buckeyes. Alabama's Mark Ingram and Trent Richardson will prove once again why they are the two-headed monster of college football. The duo will run through the Buckeyes defense in the 2nd half, eating the clock and rendering Coach UTVOL54 to watch helplessly from the sidelines. Alabama wins 21-17, and leaves Buckeye fans, once again in tears. Unless Coach UTVOL54 has a trick up his sleeve............


Lee Corso loves the elephant and its trunk


Ohio State fans, in tears, again

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#2 LSU @ #4 OKLAHOMA


In one of RUTS's all-time bitter coaching rivalries, Coach utvol27 and Coach cjohnchavis lock horns this week after a season-long hiatus in the rivalry. Their teams, #2 LSU and #4 Oklahoma, did not meet in season 1, and many have wondered if the long lapse of time between their games has stifled the animosity between them.

"No way," said ESPN reporter Bruce Feldman. "This rivalry dates back to RUTS1, when these two sideline superpowers collided each year. Coach utvol27's Clemson team prevailed every time, and that bad taste has not faded away from Coach cjohnchavis's pallet."

Coach cjohnchavis has often termed Coach utvol54 the "Dr. Evil of football" for his always winning ways and abilities to use psycho-kinetic energy to cause freeze delays in the game at just the right time.

Their teams even met in the RUTS1, season 3 national title game, where Clemson prevailed 24-10.



"I am focused on my team this week," said Coach cjohnchavis. "There is a reason we are favored by .25 of a point. We are a solid team, and we will be ready for any tomfollery and spells that Dr. Evil has planned. The Tigers of LSU will roar....raaaaaaaaaawwwwwwwwwrrrrrrr."

After the coach's surprising tiger roar, Feldman said Coach cjohnchavis showed the attending media his team's Tiger Claw stance, which he said would be the "key to victory" over the Sooners.

The LSU Tiger Claw! Fancy gimmick, or the key to unlock super ninja powers?

The LSU Tigers may not even need a Tiger Claw for this game. On paper, the Tigers are the better team with a punishing running game and quick strike passing attack. Two LSU WRs, Rueben Randle and Russell Sheppard are in the top 5 of the Heisman race after two weeks, and RB Steven Ridley has broken tackles left and right on his way to racking up 220 rushing yards and 3 TDs this season.

The Sooners, however, seem due for a break out game. After not winning the conference title for the first time as a collegiate coach last season, Coach utvol27's team has somewhat struggled out of the starting gate this season. Many skeptics believe the coach's mojo and magic has worn off. Not so, says QB Landry Jones.

"Coach utvol27 has the entire nation right where he wants them," said the junior signal caller. "This team is ready to explode in a good way this week, and beating the #2 team in the nation will prove that we are back."

The two coaches have refused to get into any back and forth verbal spats this week, each saying that nightly hobbies and sitcoms have gotten in the way of trash talk. But, you can bet that come gametime, the blood pressure on each sideline will be rising.

This game is difficult to predict. Will turnovers and leaping DTs and LBs thwart LSU's opportunity to win, or will this be the year that Coach cjohnchavis breaks on through to the other side and claims victory? It will be a back and forth game, but we predict LSU will have one too many Tiger Claws for the Oklahoma defense. The Sooners will keep it close, but in the end, LSU's wide receiver core will make the necessary plays to give the Tigers the victory 28-20.

Tears....Sooner Tears!

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