Alabama Shocks the Nation

In a move that shocked the college football world, the #2 ranked Alabama Crimson Tide stepped outside of their "fan family" and hired Coach zeejaydee to coach the team. Coach zeejaydee, largely believed to be headed back to Eugene, OR this season, replaces the candidate most Alabama fans  believed to be the frontrunner for the job once the draft order was announced: Coach Gump.

Gump, a lifelong Alabama fan, even wore his Alabama boxer-briefs to today's media day, but it was all for naught.

Coach zee stepped to the podium, and quietly looked at the flock of reporters in the room. Some in the audience even started doing the slow "Quack....quack.....quack..." from the Mighty Ducks movies. But then....shockwaves. In WWE fashion, longtime Bama fan and Auburn-hater Harvey Updyke, recently released from prison, ran into the room, jumped on stage and stared Coach Zee in the face. The two glared at each other, and then, just as they'd apparently rehearsed, embraced!!! "Coach ZEEJAYDEE is coming to T-Town baby!" harvey exclaimed.

Reporters were shocked, as the two men frolicked with glee yelling "Roooooollllll Tiiiiiide"...

Meanwhile, Coach Gump sat on the back row in the room, sobbing. Coach zee, not a fan of crybabies, grabbed Harvey and the two chased Coach Gump out of town. There is no word on where Coach Gump will end up, but if and when he ever plays Alabama in Tuscaloosa, Coach zee and Harvey promised an ol' fashioned Alabama tail kicking. "We ran him outta town today, and as far as Harvey, Trent Richardson, and I'm concerned, he ain't ever steppin foot back in this town!" yelled Coach zeejaydee.

.....The draft continues!